Sunday, April 29, 2012
Thursday, January 12, 2012
if ya can't see? you left yer glasses on my window
cill let's just hope those cute lil raccoons don't git
t them before you do, or even worse, at the same time
you do, they're known to go wild on thursdays and
they could make you uglier than you already are
not that it's a bad thing. you can always git a face
job. i'll get old uncle bilbo t set you up with his
surgeon. says it costs two chickens and some
sweet talkin. don't worry, you have a lot goin for ya.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
She says I should be happy, for the misery has come to an end
she says to me that life just began
all he gave me was a mouthful of splinters
and wet eyeballs filled with fear
years and years and years
I wasted wallowing in the watery winter
I always chased the future and worried what was to come
I invested so much in him and in return got nothing' but a lump sum
he never cared or noticed that i was trapped in darkness
instead of lifting me out of it he turned his other cheek and went onward
he cheated, he lied, he stole my mind
wish i could kill him, expose him, hit rewind
i'm forever damaged and always ready for more
walls start to build thick around my once innocent inner core
my friend, she says she hates him
when she runs into him at bars she won't even straight face him
he doesn't understand what it was he did
he tells me we're meant to be because we fell in love when we were kids
i look the other way , i must stay strong
i accompany myself with my best friend, my bong
as i exhale my soul dances up high
but when i inhale it back it sinks and it dies
she says i will make it through this, it just takes time
she buys me shot of jose cuervo and lime
let this numb your pain for a while, flower child
let it all go , throw your sadness and burn it with the rest of the pile
she tells me to run far away and accept no apologies
i decided to get lost in hippie music anthologies
and though my body remained in the same old room
my mind sparked and sprinted from all the doom
I will never return to the unilluminated world I once resided in.
For this light, so gigantic, has shaken my soul
and it feels as though, it's frolicking inside of me,
dancing with the wind my body feels from the outside.
I am one with the universe now.
Excitement turns into peace as
I calmly stroke the barks of the trees
their branches begin to sway
to the movement of the open air,
which opens my heart.
Dragon flies, the size of crows smile
at me as they pass…
the starless tunnel, that was consuming me
shot me back up into the colorful world!
I am here. Now.
And that's all that will ever matter to me.
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
hand and hand, we walk down 14th street
and I look at you and wonder why are you so
badly withdrawn. look at you here --
no emotion to anything, not even the
softest touch of the summer breeze
or seeing a bum old bird lady cry
could make you feel any sympathy -
there you go, manufacturing those
dark iron walls that protect you from
sorrow. but what you will find is that to
not feel is sorrow as well, for you dwell
in the same dark cave most of the time
nothing to search for, nothing you will find --
you wish you had some type of praise to give
or that there really was some higher power
who controls all of us, who makes sure we all
go to heaven. but you know you don't.
damaged - because you chose too soon
and blinded by what the human experience
is supposed to be. trees behind you, blow
wind into your ears, and sometimes i can see
that your brain feels connected to mother
nature but never other humans.
you tried once or twice, but it all crashed
and you expect everyone to be normal
but in realty the concept can't exist
because everyone isn't normal so
to not be normal is normal and
aimlessly you walk, and wonder if
everyone is just hiding behind their
skin. you stop to look into their eyes
but the depth is thin, you can't tell --
you don't have the sixth sense
to read minds or understand
the meaning of life through
someone else's perspective.
you get shy when they look back…
at times you feel you'r stuck in a whirlwind
of what everyone who allegedly cares
for you wants you to become…
and at this point you'd rather be a bum
because the anxiety you get from
feeling a need to impress them
makes you feel even more empty
and more lost with who you are.
you can't even tell yourself what you want
because the answer would simply be
nothing, or something materialistic
that would band aid your sadness for a day
and in a lot of ways a quick fix used to be
all you needed --
not anymore, woe is you
for you want insight and love and peace
and all those other nearly unattainable
things that only the people in the movies or
the buddhas and shamans find. you're surrounded
by a shallow ocean that drains your
creativity and your very own peace of mind.
hopeless, but pretty, so you'll dream
just one more time and if it doesn't
work you'll pray to a different god and
hope for better results. … ..
maybe aphrodite could return your heart
and perhaps satan could
sell you back your soul --
maybe this coldness
will slowly melt into what would
become something warm again--
and a lover or friend will
come back and you can live in
a place where turquoise petals
fall from trees which you could catch and use
to wipe away your clear tears.
perhaps there's a
letter you could send, or a bargain
you can make to gain back your strength.
or at least get back your heart,
even if it's black and blue and in pieces.
i really hope one day you'll find
whatever it is you want, and just know
that you'll always be my true love
you'll be able to feel the sun shine one day,
if you could let it.
but i can't stay to help, i've gone west
i've tried my best, but it just isn't me you need.
long island, 2011